Old Scars, Old Memories
by JuniperLemon
Summary: Every Scar holds a memory. The one on Steve's forearm reminds him of the first time he was ever attacked for being gay. Tony regrets asking him about it.


They lay on Stark's large bed together lazily. The morning sun was streaming through the large windows making it feel like Summer. Steve was sleepy and allowed his eyes to drift closed which made him jump when Tony wrapped his fingers around the soldier's wrist and lifted it carefully. He peeped open an eye to watch the genius inspect the large scar on the inside of his forearm.

"How'd you get this one?" Dark eyes met light. It wasn't the first time he'd enquired about one of Steve's scars.

"It's a long story." He answered, hoping to sway the topic. It wasn't an event Steve liked to reminisce about.

"And we have several hours until we have to be on base for the meeting." Stark replied quickly. His calloused fingers touched delicately at the healed skin. His mind creating fantastical narratives within his own head.

Steve recognised the look of dreaming and snapped him out of it by snatching his arm away, "It's nothing heroic or exciting." He hoped Stark would drop it.

"Tell me. Please." He added as an afterthought.

Steve sighed and peered off into space as he mentally relived the worst 20 minutes of his younger life.

* * *

Memory

"C'mon, Steve." Bucky chuckled as he grabbed his boyfriend's hand and pulled him, almost running, down the dark street. They would have never had the confidence to even touch in broad daylight under watchful eyes. His grip tightened as giggles washed through his body making running even harder than before.

His lung rasped as they struggled to take in oxygen. The young blond silently cursed his own body and the feebleness of his continued survival. Bucky, usually ever-conscious of Steve's problems, tugged him forward mercilessly as he bounded through the dark as though existence itself wasn't destroying his body like it was to Steve's. Bucky seemed almost giddy.

They were near a dark corner; away from street lamps or houses from which people may be spying. They didn't hear the quiet, not distant enough footsteps as they leant in to kiss. Bucky's warm lips pressing softly against the cold of Steve's. The smaller man's hand came up and rested against the brunette's hip. Bucky, meanwhile, cradled Steve's face in his large hands and kiss him like he'd wanted to all day.

"Hey! Faggot!" A male voice cried out in outrage.

Steve and Bucky leapt apart from each other as though their skin was lava. They glanced around in panic to see a group of men, 4 in total, storming towards them. They started to run as fast as they could but Steve's body was already struggling from a few minutes before and Barnes was sure as hell not going to leave him.

"Come on, Steve!" The soon-to-be-soldier cried over the shouts coming behind them, "Keep running!"

"Fairies! You're perverted!" The voices reverberated off the fronts of cafes and houses as they passed by, "Go back to hell!"

His heart was thumping in his ears, blocking out most the noise around him apart from his partner urging him on faithfully. That was when the first rock was thrown. It landed a yard or so behind Steve making the weak man push harder to get away. The threat surged ever closer. He ran like never before.

He couldn't breath. His chest was fire.

When a rock hit him, knocking him off balance, it was almost a relief to his broken body. It seemed that way until the men got close enough that Steve could hear their threats. Bucky was there trying to pull him up and get him back on his feet.

He was quietly chanting, "We shoulda been more careful, we shoulda been more careful, we shoulda been more careful." Almost like a mantra.

The men were now too close and the first punch was thrown. Bucky did what he could to defend them both but they were at their non-existent mercy. He could remember being kicked and stamped on until he passed out. He couldn't see Bucky through the swarm. His last words before slipping unconscious,

"Buck. Where are you?"

* * *

He was in severe pain when he finally woke up. He was in hospital again wrapped in bandages and plaster casts. The doctor later informed him that he'd fractured or broken 5 bones in his body but they were doing what they could for him. He felt like a doll that had been torn and ripped apart then hastily thrown back together with tape, glue and messy stitches. He felt broken.

His already weak body struggled to even remain breathing and a few times the doctors had warned Bucky, who also sported a cast on his arm but aside from dark bruises was mostly okay, and his mother that Steve could easily slip away in the night. He couldn't remember much from those weeks and spent most of it unconscious.

But miraculously, the thin man managed to battle through and was finally released a few weeks later with mottled skin across his body and casts on the broken bones. His mother took care of him the weeks and months following as Bucky departed with the army a few weeks after his arm had healed.

He missed the man dearly but one thing for certain was that he'd never get himself into the same situation ever again.

* * *

Present Day

"Shit... I'm sorry." Tony muttered whilst knowing that his words could not heal that damage that had already been done. "No wonder you had internalized homophobia when we met..." He didn't like to think back to the weeks after they'd met where Steve beat himself up over the emotions he held for Tony. It took him a long while to fully understand that it is okay and natural.

Stark wiped away Cap's tears with his thumb and gently stroked against his cheek.

"It's fine." Steve sniffed, moving away from Tony so he could sit on the edge of the bed, "It was a long time ago now." The tears still streaming down his cheeks told his partner that no, it definitely wasn't fine.

The genius wrapped his arms around Steve middle and rested his chin on his shoulder. He whispered comfortingly, "It's okay. You're safe. You never have to deal with anything like that again. Nobody can hurt you now. I've got you. I've got you."

Eventually, the blond turned and curled into his partner, burying his head against his chest. He balled up small into the fetus position while his tears dampened Stark's shirt. The billionaire didn't complain instead he rubbed the man's back reassuringly and promised everything would be fine.

On the bedside table Tony's StarkPhone began to ring obnoxiously. He reached across ready to silence it but he noticed it was Natasha calling. He glanced at the time and realized they were due at SHIELD any second now. He sighed and answered it.

She began to ask where they were but Tony cut her off, "We won't be able to make today's meeting. See ya." He hung up.

"No! I'm okay. I can go." Steve mumbled out through his stuffed up nose and tear stained face. He tried to get to his feet wobbly but Stark brought him back to their large bed.

"Lie down. They can do without their great and fearless leader for one day." The genius patted his lap and the exhausted superhero rested his head there. Tony then began to comb his fingers gently through his blond, perfect hair. "They managed to survive all that time before you arrived. They can deal with one meeting."

Steve sighed and relaxed against his partner's legs. Quickly, he had soon fallen asleep with Tony there to fight off the bad dreams.


End file.
